Losing Stamina


Yesterday morning was my second morning back working out after about a full week off. I am extremely sore. I am debating wether or not I should work out this morning as well. I want to. I want to get back to the point where the exercise is enjoyable and not torture. I am not there yet. It is astounding how quickly stamina disappears when a workout routine is interrupted. It happens so much faster than it is built up. I am having trouble not being discouraged.

However, I am doing pretty well all in all. I haven’t had much pain this week and I haven’t had any real big anxiety attacks either. This coming weekend should be really quiet and calm and give me plenty of time to recharge.

My newest understanding about myself is that I need to block out at least two days from doing anything stressful after doing something really stressful. Does that make sense? I mean that, if I plan something stressful, (going somewhere new, doing something I will need to make a lot of conversation, or whatever my nervous system deems to be worth getting worked up about) I also need to make sure that I keep the next two days free of anything at the same level of stress. So, really, I can do one super stressful thing a week, two at the most, and I need two days to recover.

I feel like I have had this thought before. Oh well, I am having it again. Maybe this time I will work harder to stick to that rule. Because, if I have had this thought before, I didn’t think it was important enough to keep to very strictly. Which has led me to having some very stressful and unnecessarily unpleasant days. Maybe this time I will literally block off the days on my calendar to remind myself those days are not free to throw in something extra.

That is all I have to say today. I really want to write about the movie, Joker. But tomorrow is my review day, so I will wait. (I can’t wait).

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